Friday, May 06, 2005

Whore College

This article comes courtesy of the Associated Press via Yahoo! News. My mind is speaking in blue.

'Whore College' Offers Hands-On Training

SAN FRANCISCO [shocking]- The 25 students in jeans and T-shirts could have been in any career that requires hustle. The classes, covering topics such as effective marketing, stress reduction and legal issues, could have been part of any professional development seminar.

But this was "Whore College," and any illusion it was just another corporate how-to for young go-getters abruptly ended at the sex toy display and was stripped away for good during a graphic demonstration that put a whole new twist on the concept of hands-on [bad pun #1] training. [For me, at this point, it isn't made clear if this is a college or City Hall] "We are still illegal," [And still whores] instructor Kimberlee Cline said before her 20-minute demonstration. "If we want to be treated as business professionals, [I thought you wanted to be treated like whores?] we need to act ethically within the industry." [Either that, or you could try NOT being whores to gain respect. And how would or could whores act ethically anyway? What is an UN-ethical whore? One that whores for free?]

Presented in conjunction with the San Francisco Sex Worker Film and Arts Festival, [Where their motto is: "You can't catch anything by watching!"] the class Wednesday at an erotic art gallery was billed as away for working girls and guys to polish their skills in a supportive atmosphere. [As opposed to the non-supportive whore atmospheres I guess]

It was the first time the biennial festival, begun in 1999 to showcase films about and by sex workers, included a session devoted to how to maintain a satisfying career. [Step 1: convince yourself you are not a whore, all the while attending Whore College. Step 2: Drugs, lots and lots of drugs.]

Although famously permissive [i.e. Sodomite] San Francisco has long been a hotbed for prostitutes' rights activism, [hahahahaha] the school reflects the movement's maturation [eeeww] away from a focus on decriminalization toward a broader agenda that includes occupational health and safety and community-building, said organizer Carol Leigh. [Brilliant! Just brilliant!]

Other cities, including Tucson, Ariz., Portland, Ore., Montreal and Taipei, Taiwan, have similar events, said Leigh, a veteran activist [old whore] who takes credit for coining the term "sex worker" as an anti-euphemism. [Anti-euphemism? What is that? Does it mean the truth? Ok then, I got one - whore.]

Participants who stuck it out for the whole day [bad pun #2] received diplomas [and STD's] certifying them as G.S.W's [Gigantic Social Wacko's] graduates in sex work.

Several students went to lengths to explain that they see themselves as inheritors of a proud tradition [speechless] specialists with a choice [maybe if I "choose" I won't be a whore...Just maybe] instead of exploited victims. [true, better to be exploit yourself, spreading disease and misery than someone else exploiting you] Sporting nary a stiletto heel among them, their expressed reasons for turning to sex work an umbrella term that encompasses everything from exotic dancing and acting in pornographic films to turning tricks were as varied as their hair colors and body types. [Reason #1: I'm a whore #2: I'm a whore, too #3: Me too #4: I'm a whore AND I hate to work...]

"My own personal experience has been negative and positive, as with any job," said Kymberly Cutter, 36, a mother of two from Tucson who returned to prostitution two years ago to boost her income [and self-esteem] and regards it as part of a journey in "personal self-discovery." [Eureka! I'm a whore] Her children, ages 7 and 9, know what she does for a living, she said. [And no doubt will suffer for the rest of their lives]

The more shadowy aspects of the profession [More shadowy? More shadowy?] were covered in the curriculum. Lawyer [i.e. Professional Whore] Erin Crane explained that accepting money for a specific sex act could land someone in jail, but she repeated several times she couldn't advise anyone on how to break the law. [No worries, your still a whore anyway]

Students practiced using assertive [huh?] screaming [internally, that is] for self-defense and they were told how to assess dangerous situations, [like if some "Jon" wants to treat you as an object you, wait...oh that's right...] and how to break free from an assailant's grasp. [Scream, "I'm not that kind of whore!"]

Erin O'Bryn, 36, who has appeared on adult television networks, worked in massage parlors, owned an escort referral service and last year ran for Congress [Lawyers, Congress, Whores: birds of a feather...] in Hawaii said wearing a power suit and good [not bad] heels dissuades clients from thinking they can take advantage of her. [That is, not without a price anyway]

"Sex work is work. Prostitution is work," Leigh said. "The most important thing is that we are diverse. Some are on the streets and in a very desperate situation. Others are in a working-class situation and maybe bored in their jobs. And others see sex work as their calling." [Called to be a whore. Isn't that beautiful?]

Then again, maybe they do have a "calling" to be whores like Oholah and Oholibah:

The word of the Lord came to me: Son of man, there were two women, the daughters of one mother. They played the whore in Egypt; they played the whore in their youth; there their breasts were pressed and their virgin bosoms handled. Oholah was the name of the elder and Oholibah the name of her sister. They became mine, and they bore sons and daughters. As for their names, Oholah is Samaria, and Oholibah is Jerusalem. -Ezekiel 23:1-4

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